The Game of Social Intelligence

Robert Greene’s book “Mastery” provides examples to conquer social intelligence skills. Greene provides a display of case studies to give insight into ways social intelligence masters over the centuries have used this talent. Its benefit to current and historic individuals includes a recognized lift of status in the eyes of others.

Using the skills of social intelligence is not devious. It is a shrewd way for any of us to acquire the techniques that let us understand and deal with individuals who play the game of social intelligence. Successful navigation of complex social environments and relationships is dependent on practice and mastery of the rules followed by applying the guidelines using our own sharp powers of judgment.

The list below identifies the Seven Deadly Realities followed by a short explanation. Read the book for greater details about any or all of the realities.

The Game of Social Intelligence

Passive Aggression: Passive aggression represents an individual dread of direct confrontation. Conflict creates powerful emotions that may result in a loss of control. Passive aggressive tendencies follow the path of indirect demonstrations of hostility, such as stubbornness, procrastination, and irresponsibility. It is an indirect method designed to have things end their way. Avoid this type of person as often as you can. They may show a kind or friendly façade. Concentrate on their deeds to gain transparent image of their goals.

Conformism: We have the tendency to conform to the values of groups we join. There’s a simple answer for that, whether it is a church or social group or a team at work. Group settings encourage members to conform to moral or political values held or practiced by the leader. When we strive to achieve mastery, we often stand out more than others. Think before speaking lest your words be misunderstood or infer a challenge or disagreement. Subdue your true feelings during your progress towards mastery and let your work demonstrate what it is you want to say.

Envy: Humans think and act in certain ways without stopping to consider what they are doing. Comparing themselves to other people, regardless of any differences in circumstances, is an example of human nature. Insecurities are known to cause extreme levels of envy in some people. Watch for the following actions if you believe another person is envious of you. A feeling of envy is demonstrated when someone you hardly know is excessively friendly or tends to pay tribute to your efforts far too often. One of the social intelligence skills is the ability to neutralize such behavior in a nonthreatening fashion. Be open about the lack of confidence you sometimes feel and your own Achilles’ heel. Praise their achievements, pay attention to how they perform their tasks, and demonstrate the ability to laugh at yourself from time to time.

Laziness: Every person has the desire to create things so they are as uncomplicated as can be. As you learn the technique of social intelligence, you’ll discover individuals who raise the bar on making things as simple as possible! They are all in favor of an “Easy Button” for every particular task that comes their way. Their unprincipled tactics include seeking shortcuts that benefit them, such as taking your ideas and presenting them as their own. It is essential to guard your thoughts and plans in the workplace by watching what you say to and share with others. A slip of the tongue to the wrong person may result in an unscrupulous person getting the credit for your visions and effort.

Self-Obsessiveness: “The world is a harsh and competitive place.” It’s difficult to acknowledge this view of community when the concept of teamwork is drummed into social practices. How essential is the need to “look out for our own interests”? It is common behavior to put ourselves first. The tendency is to deny our actions when we put our own wants and needs first – in some cases, we’re unaware it’s happening. Self-centered people go beyond this normal behavior by dripping a virtuous aura of concern about appropriate matters that draw interest. It is an undesirable characteristic that is often difficult to recognize in others. The more familiar they become, however, the easier it is to identify their egotistical spirit. They are the ones that promise to be there to help whenever needed and then either fail to show up as promised or conveniently stay out of reach so they cannot be asked for help. Is this something that you have experienced?

Rigidity: In some instances, we create a “false simplicity” to give some assurance of personal control over this bizarre world. We develop a schedule smoothed by habits and participate in familiar activities; it is habits like these that cause people to dread new experiences. It is a waste of time to struggle with them. Instead, design and follow a policy to “accept rigidity in others” while showing respect for their compulsion for order.

Flightiness: There’s no getting around it. Our emotions have a big influence on how we feel about things because they direct our thoughts and perceptions. Some people change their mind about certain things on a daily basis because of emotions. The constant change is a bewildering situation to the rest of us when we are dealing with a particularly flighty person. If you must deal with someone like this, try to avoid their words and make a point of concentrating on their actions.