Self Management And Personal Success – Part 2

Welcome back!

In Self Management And Personal Success – Part 1 we began this subject of self-management and how it affects your personal success and can limit you from reaching your peak performance.

I started by making the point that whatever attitude you have about the world then you will bring this same belief upon yourself. Your attitude is a good indicator of the respect you have about your ability to bring about the type of vision and dreams you want to have.

Today we’ll continue this discussion…

Application

In my coaching, when a client highlights particular goals that they want to work towards it is always easy to begin working on the tangible aspects of that goal. The tangible parts are easier to measure and see. However all aspects of the goals will not be realized if my client doesn’t look at themselves to see what they need to know to be able to attain these goals.

For instance, if a client is not seeing the world in an optimistic way then this is an opportunity for me to coach them and ask them some questions so they can see their world more clearly.

Seeing the world in a negative way is a trained process. When we are born we do not see the world as negative. We see the world as an amazing place, full of things to explore and discover. It is only over time that we are conditioned to see things in a negative way.

We can change this.

We can change the way we view the world and ourselves. You can do this by imagining trying on a different pair of glasses, one’s that shifted your perspective where everything looked beautiful.

What would they see?

How would this new view of the world help you reach your peak performance?

Sometimes you may observe others or even yourself and feel as though they are always wearing a black hat. Edward de Bono came up with a model for a new way of thinking. He would make six hats all of different colors. He would then ask people in a team to each wear a different colored hat. Each hat represented a different thought process that was necessary in thinking creatively.

• The white hat represented factual information

• The red hat was for emotions

• The yellow hat was for positivity

• The blue hat was for process control, usually worn by the leader of the group who identified when it was time to change hats

• The green hat was for creative thought

• The last and final hat was the black hat for critical thinking

The person with the black hat on had to look at the bad points of a decision in a cautious, defensive way. They had to look at all the weak points in the decision.

So now you can see how some people, maybe even you, only ever wear a black hat. Now that you this model of the different hats you can mentally changes hats when you are thinking through important, and even not so important decisions.

The key here is to help you see a different perspective.

Interestingly as well is the color of the black hat. It may be fun to see what impact the other colors have on you as you wear them. Go out and get some different colored hats and physically where one when you are in mist of decision or even a phone conversation.  This is a great way shift your energy from negative thoughts in other realms and set you up for peak performance.

A key aim of my coaching, my blog, podcasts and newsletter is to keep you moving forward. It is important to me to support you to live in a state of positive action so that you can achieve your personal success.

If this sounds exhausting, perhaps I need to define “action” more clearly. When I use the term “living in action? images of marathon runners, or high performing CEO’s may spring to mind.

These people are certainly living in action, but so are we all. All of us live in action, all of the time. We move through the world taking in information and making choices, which allow us to learn, which, in turn, impact on our next set of experiences. The fundamental difference is whether we are in positive or negative action, growth or decline.

Whether this action helps move you towards peak performance and personal success or hold you back and create a victim mentality.

Growth vs. Decline

People are never really sitting still. They are always making choices, which have effects. When they make positive choices, these have positive effects, which then make it easy to make other positive choices. When they make negative choices, these have negative effects, which often lead to other negative choices.

Our choices can sometimes set off a domino effect, which sends us into a growth or decline spiral. In extreme cases this growth or decline can be in a broad range of areas in our lives, however, for most of us we are always growing in some areas and declining in others.

“One of the single greatest obstacles of moving forward in life is the sensation of fear. Fear reveals itself in many ways: the fear of failure, the fear of the unknown, the fear of pain. And, at the heart of fear is inactivity. It is paralyzing physically, emotionally, and mentally. It prevents one from moving forward in life and thus entraps one in a cycle of stagnation.” Bill Turpin – Coach and Trainer

To illustrate, let me tell you a story….a story about Carol’s experience of becoming physically fit, for the first time in her adult life…in her early forties. Carol spent a great deal of her twenties and thirties balancing work and family commitments.

There was very little time left for Carol. At age 40, Carol was finally finding some time for herself and trying to incorporate some exercise into her schedule, when a friend asked her to be a walking partner.

For 3 mornings a week for a year, Carol and her friend met at 6am and walked around a local park. Having her friend waiting for her was just the incentive Carol needed to get out of bed.

After 6 months, Carol’s friend moved away. Feeling uncomfortable walking on by herself, Carol began attending a local gym 3 times a week to walk on the treadmill. After a few months of 3 times a week, Carol found herself waking early most days, so it was a small step to begin attending 5 times a week instead of 3.

A few months later, a trainer approached Carol and asked her if she wanted to include some weight training in her routine. Carol agreed and soon began branching out to other equipment in the gym. Carol is now a very fit lady, with good health and high energy.

This energy is manifesting itself in her work where she is achieving peak performance and personal success.

It is easy to see how one of Carol’s good choices let to another. By choosing to walk with a friend, Carol found that her sleep habits changed and she was able to wake early 5 times a week. By building up her initial fitness, weight training became a small step instead of a huge challenge. Carol’s good choices lead to good results, which made her feel good.

Research in the field of Positive Psychology, tells us that even small increases in good feelings such as hope, optimism, and general happiness, can lead to significant improvement in performance.

These periods of positive growth leading to a sense of fulfilment are often referred to as “flow states” or “being in the zone”; a feeling of being engaged with life to the point where time flies and success feels normal. (Kaufman, 2006) Part of a my role is is to keep my clients in this “flow state”.

Request an Introductory Consultation with me HERE to explore coaching further how to get into this flow state for peak performance and personal success.

References

• Kaufman, Carol, 2006, Positive Psychology: The Science at the Heart of Coaching, in Stober,
• Dianne and Grant, Anthony (eds), 2006, Evidence Based Coaching Handbook,
• John Wiley and Sons, New Jersey Kolb, D. 1984, Experiential Learning. Prentice Hall, Englewood Cliffs, NJ